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Thursday, February 17, 2011

Travel & Marriage to a Foreigner?

Today, I got into an online chat with a dear female friend I met in Perú over a year ago. As a dear friend, I truly love her. In this particular conversation, she, to my surprise, popped the question; marry her so she can come to the USA. I explained to her that when I marry, it will be for love and nothing less.

As a single guy, I've been approached by women from nine different countries about marriage. Most were up front about their motive and even offered me several thousand dollars. María, the Peruvian-American owner of a café that I frequent in the mornings, asked if I will be looking for someone special when I return to Perú. My mind went back to my trip to Cuba where I met Luisa who immediately begged me to take her back home to the USA. It was evident through her behavior that true love was not in the equation, especially when I suggested that I stay in Cuba to be with her. That shut her up! I had only two reasons for being in Cuba in the first place----language and cultural immersion and the development of my salsa dancing skills. Making lifetime “friendships” was a big plus, but marriage? I don't “think” so!

It was evident through her behavior that true love was not in the equation, especially when I suggested that I stay in Cuba to be with her. That shut her up!

My fourth and most recent trip to Perú was no different from my trip to Cuba, or any other country that I've visited; it was strictly for language and cultural immersion. Making lifetime “friendships“ was a plus.

Fortunately, I have several family-like connections in Perú. People whom I love and respect as members of the African diaspora. I especially look forward to seeing Daniela, my goddaughter and her family to whom I frequently call and send money. When I'm in Perú, we have a great time playing games, going to parks, the beach, children play centers, to dinners, and eating ice cream.

There are too many cases of men and women marrying someone from a different country only to burned when their spouses acquire permanent resident status.


But marriage? Ummm, I don't “think” so! At least not to someone who doesn't legally reside in the USA. There are too many cases of men and women marrying someone from a different country only to be burned when their spouses acquire permanent resident status. María, who herself knows of such cases, told me that I shouldn't blame them for they are only looking for a better life. Although, I can understand looking for a better life, but feigning love and breaking the hearts of those who who truly love them is not the answer; in fact, it's corruption. If I meet and marry a woman, she will either be a citizen of the United States of America, or at least, a permanent resident alien already.